Law v. Life

I'm jealous.

I don't want to be, but I am. It's irrational, I know. It's not all consuming, and I think I'm hiding it well, but stil, I'm jealous. I have a very good male friend, who I have spent a lot of time with over the last year. He is always reliably available to get a drink, go out with me practically every Friday night, listen to my problems, conspire about my horrible "best friend" who treats him just as poorly, and sometimes hook up. It is the sort of relationhip where if everything were different, maybe we would date. But, neither one of us wants that at all. I am 100% sure that I do not want to date him and that if we did it would be a disaster. And he feels the same way. When we go out, we both flirt with other people and we talk about who we are interested in or what horrible dating ordeal we have just been through. He is the perfect kind of guy friend.

But now I have introduced him to a girl. It is the first time in my life that I have ever played matchmaker. I met this girl a few months ago and immediately knew he would think she was cute. She is very cute in a girl next door kind of way, with a great smile. She is very little, but curvy. His perfect woman, looks wise. She was new to town and single and when I mentioned it, she was interested in meeting him. I set up a first casual meeting, when he was hanging out with me, but basically she and I talked and he just sat there because we were rambling on so much. So she had no real opinion of him, and nothing happened after that. As I got to know her better, I realized that beyond looks, she really would be a great match for him. But I didn't want to arrange another forced meeting, plus that whole bar exam kept me a little busy. Until a couple of nights ago. He and I were supposed to go out and then I got a call to meet another friend, so he decided to meet us. And she was there. And they liked each other. It was cute. It's not like they are anywhere near actually dating, but I think there is a distinct possibility. And as I talked to him on the phone about how to ask her out, I realized I was jealous. I don't want to lose him as a friend, which I know I won't, but sometimes jealousy wins, at least for a moment, at 2:30 in the morning.

10:27 AM

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