Law v. Life

In case things don't go well tomorrow, I'm trying to think of alternative career paths.

1. Window washer - indoor only (not so into the heights thing) - I hate to clean, but for some reason I really like washing windows. Especially if they are really dirty. It's nice to see your hard work pay off right away.

2. Hostess at fancy restaurant - I like to wear nice dresses and I can smile for hours. I was once a waitress and I was horrible at it and when I mix drinks they always taste like pure alcohol, so I think I'm stuck with hostess if I aim for the food service industry. Fast food probably wouldn't work out so well either because it is just too dirty for me. I don't like to get dirty.

3. Coffee shop secret shopper - needs no explanation.

4. Moderately upscale prostitute - I would say high class, but I just can't believe there is much of a market for that in Columbus. I met quite a few not so upscale prostitutes when I worked at the PD's office, and I know I'm a step up from that. I know, it's degrading, dirty, dangerous... Aside from all that and the probably devastating emotional toll, it just sounds like such easy money.

5. Visitor's bureau representative - I am frighteningly enthusiastic about all that Columbus has to offer. First year the CBA rep at orientation told me I should work for the visitor's bureau. Is that what you are supposed to say to a 1L?

6. Restaurant critic - Okay, I would probably do this anyway if I had the chance. I love good food, but am very picky, and I always think people care about my opinions. In college I did an entire tutorial on writing criticism for print media, so it would still be kind of like I was using my education.

7. Peanut vendor - It would be awesome to sell peanuts at baseball games. I would do hockey too. And I would sell cotton candy if I had to even though I think it's gross. I'm not strong enough for beer though. Although maybe I could work up to that, because that's where the tips are. I couldn't get a job as an usher with the Mariners because I had a college degree, so the JD might be a slight impediment, but I could always leave it off my application. Sports almost every night could help make up for the less than stellar wages.

8. Private Investigator - I should already be charging for this. I am way too good at finding out information about people. If I had a license to do it I would have an excuse to take those steps that cross my mind but are out of line as an amateur.

I wanted to think of 10 possible careers so I would go to sleep tonight filled with hope no matter what happens, but I just can't think of anything else I have the right skills for. I'll think about it more if I have to, I guess. Now I'm going to bang my head against the wall to try to knock myself out for the night.

9:35 PM

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